Intention and Parenting. The beginning of a journey.
Intention gives you the power to change in the direction you want.
Sometimes we feel we want to change, but some resistance emerges as fear freezes us, and we feel stuck. The first step to move forward and start a change is to let go of our fears and self-criticism while accepting our reality. Then, we can decide to transform our life positively. At that moment, instead of immediately taking action, we can examine how we want to be or feel as we evolve, understanding the reason why we want to accomplish a certain goal or why we want to do it. We can Awake our Intentions and prefer to create our future by selecting which intentional actions we want to take.
Connection and the sense of belonging are inherent needs of human beings. The communication of those needs in our relationships modulates their quality. Recognizing our inner values and how we want to be in a relationship helps to define consciously our behavior towards another person or even toward ourselves. This knowledge keeps us away from the need to prove to others that we are worthy and good as a parent and makes us embrace what is really important to us and living it through intentional decisions.
Action Changes Things.
I invite You to reflect on your intentions as a parent: -How do you want to communicate with your child? -Which values you want them to know and engage? Respect, empathy, compassion for themselves, and others? -How do you want them to reach you? With openness and/or trust? -How do you want to approach your kids when a conflict arises? Calm, with understanding and respect? -How do you want your child, as a grown-up, to describe you as a parent? -What kind of parent I want to be right now? -In which type of environment would I like to raise my child?
I can share two of my intentions as a mother, which help me stay calm while dealing with conflict. They can guide me in how I want to act toward my children:
“I intend to give unconditional love and understanding to my children.”
“I intend to approach my children with non-judgmental curiosity.”
First, I selected some of my values that I treasure as a mother: love, non-judgmental curiosity, and understanding. And then it was easy to formulate my intentions. Maybe you are questioning the meaning of non-judgmental curiosity…When there’s a conflict, I am willing not to jump promptly into conclusions or judgments without hearing what my children have to say. I want to be curious about their explanations, what in their view occurred and lead to the conflict. With that, I can understand their position and reality, independently of my opinion. I can offer a safe and open place to talk about difficulties. That’s what is really significant to me.
When I remember these two intentions, I remain calm and try my best to reach my children with an open mind and heart, even if the conflict is hard to deal with. Sometimes I disconnect from my intentions; I am upset and not calm. I am intentionally gentle with myself during this practice as it takes time to learn. But the importance of having my intentions set is enormous as they are my guiding star. When I know my intentions, I can come back and remember clearly my purpose as a mother, and I can evaluate whether my action transmits my values and if my action is beneficial for my children and me or not. I can then stop or continue that action. It is my choice.
Living with Intention influences your mindset and relationships, giving you freedom of choice and clarity to take actions that resonate with you. The human experience as a parent will be richer and meaningful as you connect to your child with authenticity. Your child will notice the deepness of your connection and treasure it.
That’s the Power of Intention.